Providing a personal understanding and insights about how to open to receive from another when deeply seeded beliefs that block exist.
Part of the cycle of living includes to receive from life. Whether that is essential nutrients and sustenance for our physical body, caring acts for our tender heart, knowledge for our thirsty brain, or felt experiences for our sensual soul.
People we interact with, information from books and other resources and nature’s offering to our senses are all giving to us.
Or attempting to.
However, for many reasons our ability to receive may become blocked, and it’s understandable why the blocks develop. Painful moments, societal or home-life messages, deeply seeded doubts about our worthiness to receive can all create barriers to what we most need and the essence we long for.
But, when we are able to receive from another person, we get nourishment that is essential for our heart. For us to experience wholeness as a human being and experience the depth of our self.
To receive is our inhale, as essential as giving’s exhale.
To receive from another is when we ~
~ Accept an acknowledgment of our efforts in life and allow the compliment to fully resonate as is;
~ Accept offers of help that will ease our to-do list;
~ Allow an expression of empathy to envelope our heart when in the midst of a difficult situation;
~ And allow for ourself to receive the interest and attention of another person.
Do you ever find yourself diverting the conversation to remain focused on the other person? Another person that you would like to connect with, but the prospect of revealing more about yourself has you gripped in fear and anxiety?
When I realized my own avoidance tactics, I asked myself, “Why would I block someone I want to connect with from knowing me?” and I made a twofold discovery. One, I believed that the real me wasn’t worth knowing. And two, that I struggled to believe in someone’s genuine interest in me, with genuine being the key word.
This was not the most wonderful news and left me pondering, “So now what?” How to open to receive from another when such deeply seeded beliefs that block exist?
Sometimes in life we can ‘push’ ourselves to do something. Maybe a little longer on the exercise machines or more time with the academic books. However, to learn how to receive isn’t one of the times to push.
Gentle is an important way for we are asking our delicate hearts to open further to life.
To continue with myself as an example, I expanded the question, “Why would I block someone I want to connect with from knowing me?” and asked myself, “Why am I protecting myself?”
This question, “Why am I protecting myself?”, helped me realize that while some part of me believed I wasn’t worth knowing, I also held the belief that I matter. I matter to me and don’t want to get hurt.
I focused on the “I matter to me.” This was good news. I do matter and this belief was a place to start to build my belief of my value as a living being.
In regards to the second discovery I made about how it was difficult for me to believe in someone’s genuine nature and interest in knowing me, I utilized another question to discover a way forward. And asked myself, “Am I willing to connect with genuine well-intentioned people?”
When we say yes to that question, the inquiry assists us to expand our sight to see genuine, well-intentioned folks in our world. Put effort into noticing interactions of kindness. Notice the folks that make an effort in their own lives to have a positive impact on the people around them and within their community.
Yes, there have been folks whom our interaction with has resulted in pain and that truth should not be discarded.
Difficulties to receive, in many ways, stem from past conditioning. We can help our mind, body and heart open to receive from another through the practice of experimentation. Practice of experimentation encourages the chains of old to loosen and then dissolve their grip that restricts our ability to receive.
The practice of experimentation is the mindful effort to engage in new exchanges and we can start in environments that feel safe for us.
For me, I started in nature. I ventured out and explored different hiking trails. Learned new terrain and received new insights from the trees and animals who reside on these paths.
I continued my practice of experimentation with an expedition into the music world. Listened to music from all types of genres, and from many different continents. Learned the backstories of the songs as I heard the artists’ interviews. And, received into me the music’s sounds of diversity and commonality as well as, the passion of the artist.
I continue my practice of experimentation now in environments where the engagements include interactions with other people. And as I enter each new moment, I hold the intention to receive someone’s smile, receive someone’s hello, receive someone’s genuine interest to meet me.
Each step builds my ability to receive.
Mindful attention in this practice includes our awareness of how we feel in each moment and to honor those feelings, release tendencies to grip onto expectations and allow ourselves the pleasure of surprise. Plus, give ourselves permission to have the experience of being embraced for who we are.
This is a lifetime practice. A continual training of ourself to open and re-open to life. Pains occur and our hearts restrict inward to then cry into beliefs of absolutes. Absolutes that all similar exchanges will have the same painful result, whether that’s in intimate relationships, friendships, entrepreneurial endeavors and so on.
However, this creative world isn’t made in absolutes. And while our hearts may be delicate, that delicate nature is built on a foundation of resiliency, courage and strength.
One of the most beautiful gifts we can give ourself in this lifetime is the gift of receiving from another soul.
Begin with a step in experimentation. Newness will unleash the grip of old.