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What Is Self Image and Self Esteem? by Irene Conlan


What is Self Image?


Your self-image is the way you see yourself in your mind. These are the internal pictures, sounds and feelings of ourselves that we recognise as ‘us’. Self-image may be how you see yourself physically, or your opinion of who and what you are (which is normally called self-concept). It is important as it affects your self-esteem and confidence. Self-image is really powerful because your behaviour will almost never swerve away from this internal picture. Your mind behaves consistently with the kind of person that you think you are.


Many people are not aware of their own self-image until they really look! We are usually preoccupied with the images that bombard us in the media every day and of the people around us, rarely taking time to examine our own.


Self-image includes:


– What you think you look like

– How you see your personality

– What kind of person you think you are

– What you believe others think of you

– How much you like yourself or think others like you

– The status you feel you have

– How you think you should dress and behave according to your age


What does self-image have to do with self-esteem?


Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. Image is about how you see yourself and how you believe others see you. They are closely connected because if you have a poor self-image or opinion of yourself – your self-esteem will be low.


Image is to do with perception. How you see yourself is vital because this will affect your behaviour, your thinking, and how you relate to others. People respond to you either positively or negatively according to how confident you are. Your confidence in relationships depends on the image you have of yourself.


How you see yourself is often different from how others view you. Your view of yourself is shaped by your unique thoughts and beliefs and you will have a distorted view. You will see yourself in a positive or negative way according to your level of self-esteem. You may have a negative view of yourself and, if so, you are probably highly critical of yourself. We all know people, and we may be guilty of this ourselves, that think they are either too fat, too thin, too shy, too old, or too ‘something else’.


The problem is that anyone who really believes, and consistently tells themselves (and others) that they are too fat, too thin, or too whatever creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. They will unconsciously sabotage any attempts to appear attractive. Because they don’t project themselves at their best, people will inevitably find them less attractive and so the cycle continues.


This is a learned behaviour that becomes a habit. You are projecting your own opinion of yourself to others. Who are they to challenge this if you don’t challenge it yourself?


Our own self-image has been formed over many years and has been affected by many events and influences in our lives, many since childhood. Many of our earliest messages from childhood were positive and encouraging, but many were often outweighed by criticism from our parents, teachers, and other role models. Unfortunately comments such as ‘you clumsy/silly/big/naughty girl’ are the ones that really stick in our minds and go on to form our own opinion and self-image and self-esteem over the years into adulthood.


We tend to remember the negative comments and experiences much more than the positive ones, and the hurt feelings stay with us, as they have the biggest impact.


It doesn’t help that many cultures quash any successes that we achieve and even appear fearful of celebrating achievements. We have all heard it said as a child: “nobody likes a show-off”. No wonder we form negative self-images of ourselves, resulting in low self-esteem, as we grow into adults!


Lynne Saint is the acclaimed author of Finding Your Way Back to YOU: A self-help book for women who want to regain their Mojo and realise their dreams!


“This post first appeared on The Self Improvement Blog.”

Ali Campbell

Ali Campbell is one of the world's leading life coaches and NLP'ers. He has built an enviable reputation as a highly motivational Coach, Therapist, Author and Presenter. Ali is the creator of the internationally acclaimed weight loss solution, The Slim Girls Box Of Secrets sold in over 44 countries and any internationally bestselling author with Just Get On With It - A caring compassionate kick up the ass published last year by Hay House even outselling the Dali Lama. As a trusted advisor to celebrities, business leaders and even royalty around the world. in the UK Ali is widely featured in the media, on television, radio and in print. With expertise gained right at the cutting edge of personal development Ali's no nonsense 'arm round your shoulder and a kick up the butt' style makes him truly unique in a field often dominated by more spin than substance.

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