Internationally acclaimed author and coach T. Harv Eker shares some wise lessons for financial-phobes on how personal and financial wellbeing may be linked, particularly during or post- recession…
On the face of it, a partnership between two people in love shouldn’t be affected by our own view of ‘The Mean Green’. Yet, as the process
of love evolves and you settle into the nesting phase and beyond, money may impact more on your lives that you might ever have imagined, particularly today. There isn’t one publicly documented divorce case that doesn’t include or allude to the ‘divorce settlement’ in the copy.
Cynical perhaps, but the facts override. According to the Office for National Statistics, a recession reflects spikes in divorce rates (see early 80s, 90s and post- 2000) and ‘Money’ would appear to be one of the major sources of conflict between couples (sorry to dampen Cupid’s bow but facts are facts). But why is this? In the main, as well as not having enough money in the bank there may be underlying factors. Bottom-line, each of you will have a varying financial blueprint, ie a different standpoint when it comes to your psychological relationship with money. Let me explain further…
If you grew up in a household where money was considered the ‘root of all evil’ and this expression was often used by one or both parents, you might grow up either believing this statement or resenting it to the very core. So having savings or creating wealth may be seen as a ‘negative’ or viewed as something potentially ‘damaging’.
For your partner, perhaps he or she grew up in a household with no money whatsoever. Therefore, whenever they earn or save money in their adult life, it is spent quicker than you can spout the word ‘debt’, because they don’t believe money will or can stick around.
Based on these two examples in the broadest of senses, there are bound to be differences in you and your partner’s approach towards money. The good news is that your financial relationship can change, regardless of where you started out.
Here’s a quick guide for you and your loved one:
❶ Examine your own relationship with money, honestly and considering whom might have influenced your attitude towards wealth
❷ Are you a spender or a saver and how does this compare to your loved one – do you rgue about money or maybe money masks other problem areas
❸ Discuss with your partner how you can better communicate as a partnership and manage your joint and individual financial future
❹ Talk about spending and saving in the context of joint and individual finances is essential, particularly if you have dependents
❺ Take action and responsibility for your decisions and actions: make a plan together including individual and dual check-lists, look at monthly outgoings and what can be saved and use the T. Harv Eker ‘Jar System’ to help you better manage your cash
Change rarely happens overnight as deeply ingrained habits are hard to break for most people. However, with a joint common goal, the stress of sole combat may diminish and you might even have spare pennies in your ‘Play’ Jar to spoil your partner every year on Valentine’s Day.
If you don’t know what a Play Jar is you will just have to attend one of my Millionaire Mind Intensive seminars to find out…