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5 Ways To ‘Fake’ Confidence – by Michele Paradise


Michele Paradise, trainer at our Powerful Presentation Skills weekend, gives you 5 tips on how to be confident.

1: Be Someone Different
If you feel uncomfortable in your own skin, why not slip into someone else’s before you go out? Start by choosing an iconic person in your life – someone who has qualirites and traits you admire. It can be anyone – your mother, a celebrity, even someone you saw in the street who looked poised, relaxed and self-assured. Imagine that person is standing in front of you. Use all your senses to get a clear image in your head, until you can see, sense, almost smell them. Then close your eyes, take a step forward, and step into their skin. This simple technique realy works and is a great way to reinvent yourself.

2: Accept A Complimement
If someone admires your outfit, resist the urge to downplay it by answering, ‘Oh this, I got it for £5 in Primark…’ By doing so, you are saying to them, ‘I don’t value your opinion and I don’t believe it’. Instead, accept the compliment graciously. Women often worry about being seen as arrogant or selfish, but confidence is a state of mind, and you’ve got to love and believe in yourself and that you have good things to offer the rest of the world, before others can do the same.

3: Look And Listen
In situations where you’re feeling insecure – perhaps at a party where you don’t know anyone – keep your eyes and ears open and your mouth shut. Nerves can cause you to prattle on, and end up driving people away. Being quiet and really listening is the best way to impress. Look engaged and you’ll be perceived as cool and enigmatic. Remember, people don’t think about us as much as we think they do; they’re busy talking about themselves. So if you find it difficult to look somenone in the eye, try this trick: Look at their forehead instead. They won’t even notice you’re not making direct eye contact!

4: Stand Tall

Good posture speaks volumes; it’s the quickest way to look and feel confident. It’s fantastic non-verbal communication – a way of saying ‘I feel good about myself’. Walk in to a room with good posture and you will be treated differently. And you can have in it just five minutes. Do some deep 360-degree shoulder rolls, and on the final rotation, drop your shoulders back and down. Engage your core muscles in your abdomen, pelvic floor and hips, but not your lower back- to hold up your spine. You’ll automatically look 5lb slimmer, and feel better, too, as it opens up all of your major organs and helps you breathe deeper.

5: Get Into The Groove
Being attactive isn’t just about looks – we’ve all experienced people blossoming before our eyes, or those we initially were attracted to becoming less appealing. By getting in a confident zone, you’ll show yourself in your best light. If you’re dreading something, use your time beforehand to boost your mood. Music lifts your spirits so play a soundtrack full of songs that make your happy. If can sing along, all the better – it’s a great way to release tension

Michele Paradise

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Michele Paradise

My life has been interesting to say the least. I was born and raised in the USA and whilst getting my communications degree at American University in Washington DC, I worked for a magazine, the Pentagon and then decided to follow my dream to become a fashion model. My journey took me from New York, to Milan, Paris and London, where I settled over 20 years ago. During my time as a model I had a difficult and sometimes dangerous relationship with food, which caused me to be anorexic for over a year. I then went on to train models, actors and presenters in confidence and presentational skills, which led to several appearances on TV such as Britain’s Next Top Model, ASBO Teen to Beauty Queen, Britain’s Missing Top Model, 10 Years Younger, Model Behaviour and more. I fell in love with London and decided to stay and eventually married and had two children. My children are now teenagers and I am single. I tell you this as I think it is important to know that I have been through some life altering situations myself and had issues that have now been resolved through changing my perspectives and beliefs. I trained with Dr Richard Bandler, co creator of NLP, and Paul McKenna as well as Michael Neill, John LaValle and Katherine LaValle, who are all well recognised in the field of change and therapy. I have qualified as an NLP Master Practitioner, Hypnotherapist and NLP Trainer. I now assist Dr Bandler and Paul McKenna on their courses and training. I also present my own seminars and continue to work with people who want to feel more confident in their life as well as having the freedom from phobias, smoking, making bad choices, developing better relationships, addictions and anything else that is holding them back. I have a private practice at 1 Harley Street in London and also see clients at my home in northwest London. Because of my vast experience in training and life, I welcome all issues and know that I am able to quickly and effectively change your mind for good. Your good! I am fully certified and insured as well as a member of the Society of NLP.

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