Are you playing ‘What if…’ game? By Jana Smandrova

Did you ever refuse to take part in some project, event, etc because you felt you were not up for it? Did youever fall ill when you were supposed to give a work presentation? Did you ever watch someone with admiration and thought to yourself – I wish I had her courage. Later on you thought well what if …this and what if …that.

If you nodded to at least one of the above I have great news for you! This article will help. The fear is not helpful, the fear is not ok. Unless, of course, you fear the situation that could result in harming you, that sort of fear is natural. It also proves to be life saving as it forces you to take immediate action – running or fighting back!

However the fear of going for first date or going for job interview, fear of taking exam, fear of disappointing the ones we love, fear of actually succeeding and not being able to maintain success, fear of not being enough, fear of being to good and end up being judged… I’m sure you can add to the list .. This fear is not just holding you back, it is paralysing, ruining all effort you’ve already put in, destroyer of your potential- life waster! We were not put on this earth to dive in the fears, live the fears … we were all given this miracle so why overcomplicate things?
Couple years back, fear like that was holding me pinned to the wall. I was fearful of attending training days where I had to network with people I never met. I am not able to do that! What will I say, I have nothing interesting to say … Thoughts were roaming my mind until they were louder than any other thoughts. I turned to coaching and Nero-linguistic programming and learned that only way to overcome the fear is to take action, hold on, live through it and turn it into strengths. And once you do that, enormous power flout thought your body.
Think about it. What are you fearful of? Do not continue reading this article until you come clear with yourself.
Unless it is something or someone that can cause real harm to you.. it is your game you are playing with yourself. So what are benefits of you staying in this game? Think about it thoroughly. There must be some positive you are reaping from this particular fear.

Consider this, in my case, it was fear of failure. I knew once I attend my training days, I will be ready to complete diploma and to complete diploma I would then have to take my final assessment. My mouth still gets dried out just by thinking of assessment. So my personal benefit from my mind games was prolonging my studies and putting off my final assessment. We know that putting off difficult situation makes it so much harder. Pressure grows, tension grows and your fear grows … until you say stop to the fear. You will not have hold of me!

What has fear been costing you in life? … for example at work
Realisation is sometimes the best way to overcoming our biggest struggles.
We can learn to manage fear.
• Take action till you become competent
• Take more action till you become confident
• Then you get to point where you will not have that fear anymore
• Only you can get yourself over the fear

If fear keeps winning it is because you are choosing it over other choices. You have to make a choice. You can overcome the fear but the decision has to come from you! Performance coaching can help you.

or visit my website at www.jana-smandrova.com

 

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